Monday, February 15, 2010

Waiting

I hate waiting and waiting and waiting especially when I find out I'm waiting for nothing! It's pretty annoying if you ask me especially when it happens all the time. My patience is tic tocking away.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

guilty as charged

It seems like I'm going through puberty and onto the next steps of becoming a man, but really I'm just sick-_- lamee. My immune system is just going crazy this year I hate it. I can't wait till I get better. Formal was Saturday lots of funn:)) Pinks afterwards long line but super worth it. Then got home and literally just knocked out. Things have been  pretty unusual for me I can hardly believe it's my life. But I mean it's good. The only thing is the guilt that's tearing at my conscience a little bit. I can't seem to get myself to just say the truth, but the only thing is that I didn't mean to keep it a secret it just happened and now that we are where we are I need...should tell you just because it's the right thing to do. But I just can't seem to find the right time to say it and I know there really isn't but I can't get the words out of my mouth. And I hate the heart pounding feeling right before I think I might say it because it just shuts me up. So whenever I get the balls to, I hope you don't think I've been lying or purposely keeping it a secret, it's just a hard thing to say and knowing myself, a little awkward too. I don't know my goal is to do it this week before I talk myself into waiting another week.

I constantly question life and everything it throws at me. I'm uncertain about the decisions I make, the obstacles given to me, and the people who are constantly in and out of my life. So here I am, trying to sort out all the things my mind wonders about.